What could be on the other side of 31 Days?
Updated: 5 hours ago
Starting a thirty-one day journey without alcohol (or less, since we're already five days into October!) won't instantly solve all your problems, but it can help you understand the reasons behind your drinking or substance use habits. This time provides a valuable chance to reflect on your emotions before, during, and after consumption.
Reflection, not perfection. Sober October isn’t necessarily about stopping, or though of course it could be. It's more to do with what your relationship with your substance of choice is. What matters is noticing whats happening with say that first sip of wine, how you feel after that first glass, the second?
Sober October was launched in the UK in 2014 by Macmillan Cancer Support as Go Sober for October, raising millions for people living with cancer. From 2026, Alcohol Change UK is the official charity behind the challenge. Participants go alcohol-free for all 31 days of October and raise money to help reduce alcohol harm across the UK.
How to take part this year:
Sign up at soberoctober.org.uk. It’s not too late to join.
Fundraise for Alcohol Change UK, on your own or by creating or joining a team.
Track your progress with Alcohol Change UK’s free Try Dry app by choosing the Sober October goal.
Many people also join in unofficially, simply as a reset after a summer of socialising, a preset before the festive season, or maybe in memory of someone who struggles with addiction who is still with us, or sadly not.
Whether you’re signed up officially or just curious, this month is a chance to pause and ask an honest question: what role does drinking, or any substance, play in my life?
When a drink becomes a way of coping
People drink and take drugs its part of life. For many and varied reasons, and for a lot of people it’s a genuinely enjoyable experience, an escapism from life, a treat. It can be part of unforgettable nights where we meet lifelong friends, and experiences that change our lives forever. This blog isn’t here to judge any of that. It’s an invitation to look a little closer at the role alcohol and substances play for you.
Sometimes, as we all know alcohol or drugs can become a crutch. Maybe helping be the person you have always aspired to be. They make you feel “enough”, or maybe your "too muchness" is contained.
Or maybe you realise they help with something else, something deeper and darker.
There is a Pandora’s box of substances, something for everyones tastes, all altering the brain and body's chemical balance. A drink after a hard day takes the edge off . A few more quietens those niggles of social anxiety . More drink still quietens that heavy grief or trauma that has never really been addressed. Maybe its loneliness or a mind that never really won’t switches off.
That relief is real, which is exactly why the pattern can take hold. The trouble is that substances numb the feeling without touching the cause. Over time they often make anxiety, low mood and poor sleep worse, so we need more of them to get the same relief.
Noticing that you drink or use to cope is not a failure. It’s useful information. It tells you there’s something underneath that deserves attention and care.
Recognising when it’s become more than a habit
Addiction rarely announces itself. It tends to build quietly, and can be surrounded by guilt, shame and frustration. It can come with the preoccupation and mental focus of how or when you can next have a drink, or few.
It can be a lonely and isolating place.
You’ve tried to cut down before and found it harder than expected
You drink or use to get through difficult feelings, not just to enjoy yourself
You need more than you used to for the same effect
You feel irritable, anxious or shaky when you go without
It’s affecting your sleep, work, relationships or money
You hide how much you’re using, or feel defensive when someone mentions it
If a few of these sound familiar, Sober October can be a gentle way to test things. If the idea of a month without feels impossible and theres lots in the social clander. A sober weekend or two could be more a mangeable. This is about you managing your needs along with your life and nobody needs to know unless you want them too.
What could you achieve in 31 days?
Everyone’s month looks different, but these are some of the changes people commonly notice.
In your body
Deeper, more restful sleep. Alcohol can help you drop off, but it disrupts the deeper stages of sleep.
Feeling better in the mornings and less tired during the day
More energy, clearer skin and easier weight management
A lower long-term risk of conditions linked to drinking, including several cancers, stroke, and heart and liver disease
In your mind
A steadier mood. Heavy drinking is strongly linked with depression, and hangovers often bring anxiety and low mood.
Clearer thinking and better focus
Less “hangxiety”: fewer “what did I say last night?” mornings spent replaying conversations over and over in your head
In your life
Money saved, which can add up quickly
Time back: evenings and weekend mornings that feel your own again
More honest insight into when, why and with whom you reach for a drink
The confidence of having done something hard
Being more present with your partner, family or children as you aren't recovering.
New experiences
Clear headed weekend mornings for a walk, a park run, a swim or a market you’d usually sleep through
Trying something you’ve always put off: a class, a choir, a creative project, a new sport
Remembering every part of a night out, and enjoying a gig, a meal or a celebration fully present
Discovering that you can be funny, relaxed and good company without a drink in your hand
Finding the alcohol-free drinks, cafes and activities you actually enjoy
New people
Others doing Sober October alongside you, whether friends, colleagues or online communities
People who share a new hobby or class, where the connection is built around doing rather than drinking
Peer support and recovery groups, full of people who understand because they’ve been there
Deeper conversations with existing friends, when you’re fully present and remember them the next day
Perhaps most importantly, a version of yourself you haven’t met in a while, or ever
Perhaps the biggest achievement isn’t physical at all. It’s discovering what comes up when the usual way of coping is taken away, and starting to find new ways to meet those feelings.
Why seeking help matters
An important safety note first. If you drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can be dangerous. The NHS advises that people who are physically dependent should get medical advice before stopping, as they may need medicine to withdraw safely. Warning signs include anxiety on waking, sweating, shaking, and nausea or vomiting in the morning. Call 999 if you experience hallucinations, severe tremors or seizures. If this could be you, speak to your GP before starting Sober October.
Beyond safety, there’s a simple truth: change is much easier with support. Many of us try to manage drinking or drug use alone because we feel embarrassed, or believe we should be able to fix it ourselves. But addiction is a health issue, not a character flaw.
Asking for help is not giving up control. It’s taking it back. A GP, a local alcohol or drug service, a mutual support group or a therapist can all help you build a plan that lasts well beyond 31 days.
Local support in Leeds and York
All three services below are free to access.
Forward Leeds is the city’s free, confidential alcohol and drug service for adults, young people and families. You can set your own goals, whether that’s cutting down or stopping. Support includes one-to-one and group work, family support and help with detox. Call 0113 887 2477, email info@forwardleeds.co.uk, or refer yourself online.
York Drug and Alcohol Service, run by Change Grow Live, offers free, confidential support to adults in York and their families, with clinical and psychological care. Call 01904 464 680 or request help online. Its service for people aged 25 and under is called The Gate.
York In Recovery is a free, peer-led group run by people with lived experience of addiction. It offers a judgement-free space, activities and connection at the Community Recovery Hub, 2 Wellington Row, York, whether you’re in recovery, thinking about it, or supporting someone you love.
How therapy can help
If substances have been a way of coping, taking them away can leave a gap. Feelings that were numbed often come back to the surface. Therapy gives you a safe, confidential space to work with those feelings rather than run from them.
In therapy you can:
Understand the why. Explore what drives the urge to drink or use, whether that’s stress, trauma, grief, anxiety or low self-worth.
Spot your triggers. Recognise the people, places, times and emotions that make cravings stronger.
Build new coping skills. Learn practical ways to manage difficult emotions, such as grounding, self-compassion and healthier routines.
Change unhelpful patterns. Gently notice the beliefs that keep the habit going, such as “I can’t relax without a drink”, and find new ways of responding.
Plan for setbacks. A slip doesn’t mean failure. Therapy helps you learn from it and keep going.
Heal relationships. Substance use often affects the people closest to us, and therapy can support repair and honest communication.
You don’t need to be in crisis, or to have labelled yourself as “addicted”, to benefit. Curiosity about your relationship with alcohol or other substances is reason enough to start a conversation.
At Hidden Insights Therapy, I work with a humanistic approach. That means sessions are shaped around you, at a pace that suits you, in a judgement-free space. I have experience supporting clients with addiction issues, and a special interest in trauma and its lasting effects on how we think, behave and cope day to day.
Substance use often overlaps with other things I support people with, including anxiety, depression, difficult life transitions, and the pressures of midlife, perimenopause and menopause. For neurodivergent people, including those with ADHD, autism or AuDHD, alcohol can sometimes become a way to manage overwhelm or social anxiety. Exploring these links together can make lasting change feel far more possible.
Making the most of your month
Know your why. Write down what you hope to get from the month and keep it somewhere you’ll see it.
Tell people. Friends and family can support you, and it’s easier to say no when they already know.
Plan for tricky moments. Think ahead about the times you’d usually drink and what you’ll do instead.
Find a swap. A favourite alcohol-free drink, an evening walk, a class or a new hobby can fill the space.
Notice and note. Jot down how you sleep, feel and cope each week. Patterns will start to show.
Be kind to yourself. If you slip, it’s information, not failure. Pick up again tomorrow.
Thirty one days, and beyond
Sober October is a starting point, not a test you pass or fail. Whatever you learn this month, about your health, your habits or the feelings beneath them, is worth something.
Reflection, not perfection. Whether you manage 31 days, 10 days or are still thinking about starting, every day you pause and reflect counts. The aim was never a perfect month. It’s a clearer understanding of yourself, and that is something no slip can take away.
If this month brings up more than you expected, you don’t have to face it alone. Reaching out for support could be the most valuable thing you achieve this October. If you’d like to explore how therapy could help, I offer a free 20-minute chat with no obligation to book further sessions. To arrange one, please get in touch.
I’m Emma, a BACP-registered counsellor at Hidden Insights Therapy. I see clients in person in Leeds City Centre, Garforth and York, or remotely online and by phone. You can reach me through the contact form on my website or by email at HiddenInsightstherapy@gmail.com.
Where to find support (UK)
Your GP: a good first step for an assessment and referral to local services
Drinkline: free, confidential national alcohol helpline on 0300 123 1110 (weekdays 9am to 8pm, weekends 11am to 4pm)
Alcoholics Anonymous: free peer support groups
SMART Recovery: groups using practical, evidence-based tools
WithYou: free support for drug and alcohol use across the UK
In an emergency, including severe withdrawal symptoms, call 999
Sources
Alcohol support, NHS
Sober October 2026, Alcohol Change UK
Forward Leeds, MindWell Leeds
York Drug and Alcohol Service, Change Grow Live
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